A Big Stress Ball

So as all of you probably have noticed I haven't posted a new weight since my 40 pounds. I have been going through some issues lately and just have been needing to work through them. 

I have learned a lot in the past week. I have finally have realized that I cannot let other people's problems affect me. Because I always like to try to take other people's problems as my own and I cannot afford to do that right now. So I haven't really being doing well on my eating but I am back in the game yet again. I hate being a yo-yo to be honest. It frustrates me so much.

I have a HUGE new motivation though but I can't say what it is yet :) You all will find out though when I get to my goal weight and all I can say is I AM SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO EXCITED!!!!!!!! I wish I could tell you guys what it is but it is hush hush until then! :D

So as of today I am fully back on the program but I am going to take baby steps back into it! I am not going to go full blown the first day. Today I am just going to eat right and workout once. I will probably be back to normal tomorrow or soon but I know I won't be doing much of working out on Christmas eve and Christmas :)

This is one of my new motto's :) 

Well if I don't post a blog before Sunday I hope that all of you have a very MERRY CHRISTMAS :))

Love you all!!

My name is Kirstin and I AM MONAVIE!

It Hit Me Like a Freight Train (not literally lol)

So as of this morning I have been maintaining the 40.4 now for 3 days. I know its because my body is making big changes and for another reason also which I am not going to talk about on here.

So yesterday my mom and I went to fashion bug because I wanted to see if I could fit into smaller pants since I have lost the 40 pounds. Well for some reason no smaller pants fit. I don't know why. I know every pant maker is different and I only tried on 2. So I was really frustrated with myself. I was like how can I lose 40 lbs and not have a smaller pant size?? but I tried on this REALLY cute dress and it was a size or two smaller than what I normally wear! I would post a picture of it but I don't want to show you guys until the night after I wear it :)) 

So here is the part when it hit me like a freight train. So this morning I got up early to workout before work as usual and I went into the bathroom and it finally hit me. WOW I really am smaller! I mean it's easier to workout now, I don't breathe as heavy, and I'm moving at a faster pace now! The thing with me is I saw the difference in the pictures, but I just didn't see the difference when I looked at myself in the mirror. 

Well we only have 17 short days of 2011. It's time to end this year strong and make 2012 the best year yet!! Start on those new years resolutions now of getting fit and healthy :) I know you can do it!! 

I am so excited to get home today after work because I know that my 40 pounds down present to myself will be there! My iPhone 4S! I am so excited to play with it!!! :D

Well I hope all of you have a BLESSED day!

My name is Kirstin and I AM MONAVIE!

The Honesty Blog

Well as of yesterday I am officially 40.4 pounds down! I am still in shock because I have never lost this much weight in my life! Here are some new before and after pictures :)

Funny part is.. I can see the difference in the pictures but I still don't physically look different I think when I look at myself. It's really weird. I wonder how long it is going to take for it to kick in that I am smaller than I have been in a very long time! Only a short 23 pounds until I am under 300. I seriously haven't been under 300 in about 5 or 6 years. It's so crazy!! 

So I am going to be totally transparent right now. So yesterday as you know I reached 40.4 lbs, amazing right? Well it is amazing to me :) So then Satan of course is doing his little schemes to knock me down a couple pegs and I let it happen unfortunately. So for my 40 pounds mark I decided that I wanted to do something big so I bought the iPhone 4S. I thought that the target mobile solutions (at the target I used to work at) had them, but they only had the 4's. So the nice person that Liz is drove to Rancho Cordova because they said that they have the 4S's well turns out it was for AT&T customers not Verizon. So we couldn't get it. My poor mom had to wait at target for like 3 or 4 hours because we thought she was supposed to be on at 930 but she wasn't going to be in until 11. So my mom let me go to church which was very nice of her :)) I didn't find out about what happened until after church. So I got home and we were calling around to the verizon stores to see if they had any in stock. Nobody did you have to pre-order it online. So I ordered my phone and we ordered my step dad's phone also and it will be here next Monday or so.

For some reason when I found out that I had to wait for the phone I just got into a mode of wanting to eat. I think my head basically said well if that is my present for 40 pounds then I have wiggle room to eat because it won't be here until next week. My mom made me realize that when I was texting her. So I came home and she had made one of my favorite desserts. Our famous cinnamon roll ups. Basically it's pie crust dough, butter, sugar, and cinnamon. We cut them into small strips, roll them up, and bake them. She convinced me that I needed to treat myself because I have been doing so good and even when I was struggling earlier in the day I didn't give in. So I had some but I probably ate 6 more than I should. I was going to only have 2. They are really small though.

So this was when Satan of course stepped in, perfect timing.. I was beating myself up so bad last night and this morning for eating those desserts to the point of crying. Which then lead to me not feeling like working out last night which was not good because I only got 20 minutes in, in the morning.

Today is a new day though. I can't beat myself up over something that happened in the past. So now I am on a jet plane to get to the big goal for Dallas! I am going to pray that God helps me shed the pounds off! I know that he is capable of anything!

Life is happening NOW not 10 pounds from now :)

My name is Kirstin and I AM MONAVIE!

A Little Red Dress :))

Well, well, well! 

Today has been so amazing I still can't even begin to believe it!!

Ok where shall I start?... hmmmm

Well church today was completely amazing! I just love my church and the family that I have there! Just an awesome place to be! I love you East Valleyians! Got to go grocery shopping with my mom and then off to a cloud 9 maybe cloud 12 day! lol.

So I got to have a day with the lovely and amazing Leah Carlson! I always love seeing her because she just makes my day so amazing! So we went to Pluto's for dinner and she bought me dinner! That was a great thing!! And then I saw that she had 3 presents in her hands!! I was like oh my gosh!! I am so blessed to know her! That's what I have to say first of all. The card she gave me had a beautiful butterfly on it and a lovely note inside that almost made me cry! She gave me this beautiful head band that had a sparkly flower on it! It was gorgeous! ....and then the big present! Which still makes me want to tear up! She got me this black sign that says INSPIRE. She hot glued 34 jewels on it for the 34 pounds I have slimmed down! Then in the next present was a cute hot glue gun with glue sticks and more jewels to put on as I lose more weight! How awesome and cute is that? So by the time I am done losing weight its going to be sparkly like crazy!! I absolutely love it :) Here is a picture of it!!

So onto the next amazing story of the day. We were going into all of the expensive stores just looking around which was totally fun but I seriously couldn't believe how much some of the stuff was! I mean there was a wallet for over $200!! So we were in Coach and all the sudden I freaked out because I couldn't find my camera. So we had to go back to Pluto's and thankfully someone turned it in! On of the worker guys had put it on and was like "Yeah I am trying to sell this camera" and I joked around and said "how much do you want for it?" he laughed and said "eh maybe $50." Then I said oh "that would be a great deal because I paid almost $300 for it!" Oi vey lol. But anyways that wasn't the amazing story. So we went into Nordstroms. I never shop in there because I know that the larger women's section doesn't even have my size there. Well my normal size when I was at my heaviest was either a 26-28 or a 30. So we were looking at clothes and then all the sudden I saw this super cute skirt (not that I could afford it, it was $80!) Well it was a size 22. So at first I told Leah, see I wouldn't even fit into this still, I still have to wait a while. Then she convinced me to try it on. So i decided to grab a couple other shirts and another skirt to just see. Well to my amazement, THE SKIRT FIT!! I mean it was tight but IT FIT!! I was so ecstatic I couldn't even believe it! Here are some pictures of me trying on some of the clothes. They may be a little blurry

This is a size 3x top that was actually pretty loose on me and then a 2x skirt which I haven't fit into in forever also!

 This is a 3x shirt that was definitely swimming on me and then my size 22 skirt!!

This is a 2x top that was a little loose with the size 22 skirt!!

So I was already sooo happy about that! Onto the last but not least amazing thing of the day! You know how when people are wanting to lose weight and they say that they want to fit into that little black dress? Well for me I want to stand out and not fit in! I want a little red dress. So we were just having some fun in Macy's looking at the red dresses. Then all the sudden Leah lifts up this most adorable red dress! It was on sale for half off so it was only $30! It was a size 18. I was like I have to get this because it will take me a while to fit into it! Well the great thing is, I fit into it but I just couldn't zip it up yet. But I got into it though! I haven't got into a size 18 dress in FOREVER! Maybe the beginning of high school! Here are some pictures :)) There is a picture of the dress and then a picture of me in it :)

I absolutely LOVE this dress! It is so gorgeous! I cannot wait until the day that I can officially wear and zip up this dress! It also tells me that my actual size when I get to my goal weight will be smaller than a 16 which totally is amazing and I am so happy!! OH YEAH! One last thing! So remember how I said that the dress was $30? When I went to buy it, it was only $20!!! I got a goal dress for only $20! and it was originally $60! WOW! I am so amazed!!

So I want to thank Leah for making me try on these clothes because it just gave me more confidence to keep pushing through and makes me even more excited to get to that finish line! We are already in the winner circle Leah! Thank you Leah for the amazing presents you gave me! I am so blessed to know you! 

Well time to go do that thing called working out :) lol. I hope all of you have a WONDERFUL day!! 

My name is Kirstin and I AM MONAVIE!